Beer, Babes and Bacon - by Michael

This is long... but I guarantee it's worth it! God is so good!

So, earlier this year this blog page sat dormant for four months from mid-January through mid-May. At that point, I informed darling Missy that I was going to hijack the blog and dedicate it to The Three B’s: Beer, Babes and Bacon. The fear of that seemed to light a fire under her and she promptly resumed her blogging activity. I don’t believe that I’ve hijacked the page since IU hired Coach Crean, but here I am today to entertain the masses. For those turned off by the idea of a Three B’s blog, never fear, that is not my purpose today (yes, men, I did just hear that collective groan of disappointment). No, today I am here to tell you the story of a lost individual’s personal revelation, salvation and prologue to what will certainly prove to be an incredible journey. Before I begin, I would like to apologize to those of you reading this who previously knew me as a reasonably talented writer. You’ve heard the saying “If you don’t use it, you’ll lose it”? Well, I have not written anything productive other than work memos in years, so I extend my apologies in advance for my loss of grammar and creative skills.

If you are anything like me, books, movies or TV episodes that begin at the ending irritate you immensely (Memento excluded). That said, I live to irritate so here is the ending of this prologue: The Lyons family will be relocating to the NW Phoenix, Arizona area this spring to assist in the planting of a new church in a region that is in desperate need of it. This is a move based solely on faith and the Lord’s guidance. To believe that my wife would do things based on that premise would not necessarily surprise people, but to know that this great endeavor has all originated and processed through what had been my relatively cold and predominantly faithless heart is the true miracle that has shocked many.

For practical purposes, we’ll begin this with what seemed like a nice, little, innocuous announcement during a River Oaks Community Church service in early to mid-May. I don’t really remember anything about the service other than they opened with an announcement that John and Laurie Williams would be relocating to Phoenix, AZ to plant a new church. Our church charter calls for the planting of new churches and it was well past time for us to do this for the first time. The complication that arose was that our area, heck, our region really had no need for another church. That led John to extensive research on the most unchurched areas of the country. Through his research the Phoenix area was the best fit as one of the top ten most unchurched areas and matching up with his pastoral approach best. To this point, I had only been attending church so that my children would not grow up ignorant to the Christian doctrine and to make Michelle happy. The truth of the matter is that I had been pretty close to being agnostic since September 3, 2003. That is the day that Shelly Litzenberg, a lifelong friend, died well before anyone was ready to let her go. After her funeral, I essentially threw in the towel on God. I still believed in him, I just did not believe that he cared what went on here on earth. From my perspective we were merely goldfish in a huge aquarium and when we died God just flushed us and got a replacement.

On May 30, Paige approached me for our nightly routine before her bedtime. I had not felt well all day, and as I leaned forward to start the routine I apparently froze in place for minutes murmuring incoherently and doing nothing but rotating my thumbs over my fingers. When I came out of it, I could not remember anything from the previous period and everyone was just a tad freaked out over it. Prior to this I had been experiencing an increase in both occurrences and intensity of headaches for several months. This led to nearly a month of intense testing by several doctors and specialists. At first they thought that I had been experiencing mild strokes, but once that was ruled out I became the patient in an episode of “House” as they just kept throwing ideas out there, testing and then ruling them out. Finally, on June 21 we got the results from a full body MRI that focused on the spine, cerebral spinal fluid and brain. I had a mild Chiari Malformation (my brain was recessing outside my skull and sharing space with the spinal column) and Syringomyelia (a buildup of spinal fluid between the T2 and T10 vertebrae). For further information on these you can reference posts on this blog from June 28 through July. The Chiari issue was labeled as very borderline as it was only 3mm in size at that time, but the Syringomyelia was troublesome. I had to decide whether to have a rather risky surgery that may or may not relieve my issues or just continue to live with my situation.



My condition had been getting progressively worse leading up to that June 21 date. Kayleigh graduated and I barely remember it. I know that I spent most of the party sitting in the corner of the back deck in a daze with people occasionally coming out to see me. It was obvious that I was not doing well, and I felt like I was taking away from Kayleigh’s day because much of the focus turned toward me. I remember many people mentioning that they were praying for me. It was nice to hear, but I had never been a believer that prayer actually accomplished anything. I would recite empty Our Father’s and Hail Mary’s, but I don’t think that I had actually given thanks to God for anything or requested anything of Him since Michelle almost died while giving birth to Chase. After hearing that these people were focusing prayer on me, I decided that I might give it a try. I mean these were all well-meaning Christians who had been there for my family through the nearly disastrous year that Kayleigh had in 2011 when she was hospitalized for two prolonged periods while struggling with her newly diagnosed Dysautonomia and then later a collapsed lung. They had spent serious time in prayer about, with and over her. They had taken care of our family by providing meals, taking care of Chase and Paige and through prayer. I had brushed off the prayer at that point, but the true love that they had shown my family stuck with me. After days of what I felt were failed days of prayer, I finally decided that I would ask for my friends and the church community’s help through prayer. On June 27, I asked my bible study group to pray for guidance for me in deciding whether or not to have the surgery. On June 28, I asked my friends in the Facebook community the same (knowing that many of them would pass it along to countless others in their circles). On June 29, I received my answer. I woke up that morning with my symptoms having increased exponentially. A couple of days later they had me in for another full body MRI and discovered that the Chiari had grown to 7mm and the backup of spinal fluid had gotten much worse. Foolishly, I put the surgery off until August 1 so that I would not leave work stranded during our busiest period of the year. I must say that overall it was probably the worst month of my life, but several incredible things happened. I started to embrace prayer, to read my bible, to let people get close to me. I had spent years avoiding these things. Oh, and one other little thing happened…I had a dream. At the time, it was a seemingly silly dream. As a matter of fact, it was a dream that made Michelle laugh rather heartily when I told her. I dreamt that my family moved to Arizona with the Williams’ to assist in their church plant.



In late July, three incredible men from church asked if they could come over pray with me. To say that I was uncomfortable would be a mammoth understatement. I was new to this prayer thing and they not only wanted to come pray with me, but they wanted to place their hands on me and pray. Anybody who knows me knows this is not something I would ever have allowed before. These three incredible men placed their hands on my shoulders and head (while I admittedly cringed) and said beautiful heart-felt prayers for my surgery to go well, for my recovery to be quick and outstanding, for peace in not only my heart but that of my family and all my loved ones, and for me to grow to understand why He loves me. I cannot possibly explain the impact that this experience had on me. It is simply beyond words. This was followed by a visit from an incredible friend who came all the way down from Indiana to see me and pray with me. His wife would come down a few days later to stay with Michelle during the surgery and to pray with both of us. This is important because this outstanding couple had literally spent years attempting to engage me with the Lord, only to be rebuffed by me at every turn. It felt awesome to finally accept the gift of their prayers, and that use of awesome is in its true meaning, not the Dean Winchester overused American model of the term…it was truly awe-inspiring.


August 1^st finally came along, and the surgery went extremely well. By the time the surgery was performed, my Chiari had grown to 10mm, which the surgeon said is simply unprecedented and unexplainable. I’m thinking that I might want to be a little more careful with how I word my prayers from now on…asking for a sign that I simply cannot ignore may not have been the best way to phrase it, but I guess that’s what I needed. They encountered a few things along the way that prolonged it enough to make Michelle nervous, but in the end they removed a section of my skull, installed a comfy little “hammock” for my brain to rest in, spread some muscle and tissue to allow fluid to run more smoothly, took out a vertebrae and by the grace of God and the hands of an incredible surgeon I’m still here and feeling better than I have in years.



Throughout my six week recovery period my family and I received almost daily visits and meals from both friends and people that we did not even know from the church. During the recovery several friends took turns taking care of both Chase and Paige for both their sake and mine…the early recovery period was not a pretty thing to observe. These were acts of love that I cannot imagine ever being able to properly repay. An incredible collection of “senseless, brutal acts of kindness” (yes, Small Rebellions by Jars of Clay has become my favorite song) were gifted to us once again, just as they had been when Kayleigh was struggling with her illnesses. Suddenly, I understood what the true purpose of church was. My ill-conceived notion that it was simply a place to go and praise God for an hour each Sunday was so flawed. It wasn’t about that hour every Sunday. That is a part of it, but I came to realize that the true meaning is about the community of God and what you do in between those Sunday meetings. The quiet personal time that you spend with Him, the “senseless, brutal acts of kindness” that you do in His name, the witness that you provide for others, and the growth that you pursue by meeting with others throughout the week to cultivate your heart for His glory, those are the critical things that are produced by the church community.



During the two weeks following surgery, two men who played integral roles in my children’s spiritual growth passed away: Aaron Wilkins (Aug.6) and Jeff Yelton (Aug.16). Without getting into details, because members of both families may be reading this, I will simply say that both passed at far too young of ages and via one-in-a-million style situations. It was truly incomprehensible. Jeff was only 48. He was a deacon at Old Town Baptist Church and he played a critical role in Devin coming back to God after things had gotten away from him for a while. His was a name that I heard Devin mention at least once a day. I did not know him, yet I feel like I did and I am incredibly grateful for the guidance he provided. Aaron was only 35. He was a middle school teacher and an important part of the youth programs at River Oaks. He impacted each of my children spiritually, and since then I have gotten to know his family and I understand just how incredible he truly was. Why do I mention these men? Because it was inexplicable to me that God would allow someone who had been as distant as I had to pull through a surgery that had so much potential to go sour and then allow this pair of His devout followers to pass. These men had both done more in a couple short years for my children’s spiritual growth than I had in a lifetime. It made no sense and, if I am completely honest, I was overwhelmed with an odd sense of survivor’s guilt. This is the type of thing that had turned me away from God in the past, but now I found myself feeling like there had to be a reason why I was still here…an unachieved purpose.


About three weeks into my recovery, I again dreamt about going to Arizona with the Williams’. Again, Michelle and I just kind of laughed it off as a preposterously silly dream. Two days later something occurred that started to change our perspective. We discovered that good friends of ours from church had committed to relocate and assist the Williams. This family certainly seemed more prepared in their faith to assist in this mission, but it also seemed like an incredible risk for them. Suddenly, an avenue for dialogue about this had opened up. After talking to them we could not help but start to consider that this was something that we may actually need to consider. Soon we discovered that the family of a good friend of Chase was also considering the move which was substantial because both Chase and his friend struggle with Asperger’s Syndrome (a form of high-functioning autism that among its many traits makes social interaction difficult). The knowledge that these two could each already have a friend with them out there made the decision distinctly easier for both families. After a meeting with the Williams’ we learned that basis for this new church was everything that we were looking for. The church would be based around what we do in between those Sunday meetings through missions and what John has defined as “Life Transformation Groups”. We still were not ready to commit though. This was a HUGE decision to consider and as someone who had essentially shut God out of his life for most of his adulthood and had thrown much of his biblical knowledge into the mental furnace, it terrified me.



Michelle and I began a period of heavy prayer and research. Things suddenly began to fall into place. We discovered friends that we knew lived in Arizona, not only lived there, but they lived in the exact area we were looking at. Then we found that much of the most groundbreaking research on Chiari Malformations and Syringomyelia is being performed in Mesa (my surgery more than likely was not a permanent fix and the issues are likely to reappear down the line). Again, I put God to the test. I was again requesting an unmistakable sign. This time I predicted what the sign would be, or, rather, God knew exactly what I would be looking for. I told Michelle that if we were supposed to do this, I would receive promotion opportunities at work…the ultimate in temptation for a workaholic like me who has been biding his time waiting for openings to occur during what had to be the most stable management year and half in company history. I said this right before returning to work in mid-September. My first week back I was only working four hour days to get back into the groove of things. On my third day back, two Senior Manager positions came open and I was asked to interview for both (it wasn’t a General Manager position, but it would be a nice promotion to set me up for a GM promotion). I declined to interview for either. I didn’t even feel tempted. Despite the timing, I shook it off as a fluke. About ten days later, a GM position opened up in Alabama and I was again asked to interview. Again, I declined and truly felt no temptation to pursue it. Frankly, I was still in denial, but it was becoming difficult to deny what was happening. The clincher dropped on me the following week. My GM approached me and told me that the company would consider relocating the current manager of our Dallas facility and having me take over in Dallas if I was interested. DALLAS, seriously, DALLAS! For those of you who may not know, there are only two other places in this country that they could have used as a greater temptation: Bloomington, IN and Cincinnati, OH. Since I work for a company named Southern Theatres, I don’t think they are venturing into those areas anytime soon. This was truly the ultimate thing this company could offer me. Much to my own amazement, I again declined not feeling any real temptation to accept. Michelle was already prepared to commit before I even issued this challenge to God, and now I knew that this was definitely what we were being called to do.



Since committing to be a part of the Arizona team life has been very interesting. We’ve had conversations with all of the immediate family regarding our decision. Everyone was very accepting of our decision. Some asked a lot of questions and some got really quiet, but we did not have anyone put up any resistance, which was a blessing. After all, this is a very difficult decision to explain and it does require us to move substantially further from our entire family than we already had. Michelle and I are diligently attempting to expand our knowledge of God’s word, because our hearts are willing but our knowledge and understanding definitely require much more work. Since we are moving mid-school year, the kids want to finish out the year homeschooling after we move and then enter their new schools in the fall, so I have a lot of prep work to do for that. Michelle is already fielding job offers since there is no shortage of need for an OT with a lot of experience with geriatrics in Arizona. It is all going to be a matter of timing and negotiation with that one (Come on big relocation bonus!). I still have no idea what I will be doing for employment, but I do know two things: One, it won’t be in a theater and probably not retail…the schedules are just not conducive to achieving our goals out there; Two, I think I would make a great homeschool teacher and househusband (just call me Mr. Mom). Also, just to prove that temptation never ceases, two more promotion opportunities have crossed my path since making this decision.


I have been asked by several people what it has felt like to experience a“calling”.I believe that everyone experiences them, but may not identify and pursue them when they present themselves.For me, the closest thing that I can compare it to is falling in love. Truly, the only time that I have felt an inescapable impulse like this was when I fell in love with Missy and had the desire propose to her.It starts off as an idea…An idea that you brush off because it doesn’t seem right at first.It’s too hard, it’s too much of a commitment, it’s just a rush of excitement that I am caught up in and it will pass.The thing is, it doesn’t pass. It doesn’t go away.At first it can be more like something scratching you from inside that you cannot ignore, but then it evolves and becomes something that not only can you not escape, but that you do not want to escape.It creeps into your every thought, no matter what you are doing. You’re in the middle an intensive work assignment, you’re completely engrossed in a sporting event, you’re completely focused on any number of things and yet you are not completely focused on them because this feeling has started in the background of whatever you are doing and slowly moved into the center of it.It absolutely will not allow itself to be ignored and will not relent until you finally release yourself to it, embrace it, become it. Though my wordplay may make it seem ominous or undesirable, that is certainly not the intention.It is beautiful, it is incredible, it is intense, it is LOVE!The greatest thing that I could wish for anyone would be that they would one day be gifted with the ability to recognize, embrace and experience this.


This part of the prologue ends at this point, though technically it continues until we officially relocate. For those of you who were disappointed by the absence of discussion over The Three B’s, there may still be hope. Though I must end this blog entry here, that does not mean that I won’t be back to hijack the blog again in the future. There is plenty of space in God’s world for beer, babes and bacon and I just may come back at some point to explain it.


I leave you with this…Have you committed your senseless, brutal act of kindness today?